Tools for starting out, only going to do one bike, maybe give this VMX caper a go:
1. Really basic hand toolset, one of those Supercheap toolboxes with heaps of shiny things
2. Flywheel puller to suit your bike
3. Tension wrench (this is one tool you should not be a cheapskate on)
4. Couple of tire irons
5. Spoke spanner
6. Old metal valve cap that has the jigger on the end to screw out Schrader valves
7. Couple of hammers and some brass drifts
8. Wire brushes
9. Hand tire pump
10. Soldering iron to put ends on cables and do old school wiring (and do not forget to learn about the different types of solder)
11. Cheapo heat gun, for making plastic repairs and shrinking that cable tubee stuff (and repairing plastic is something you will never be good at)
12. Stanley knife blades for scraping back heat damaged plastic
13. Stanley knife (for the blades)
14. Bench vice (and it’s good to have a bench to put the vice on and generally work on)
15. Lump of old steel or even a piece of railway line if you can get it to hammer things on, you can hammer things on the vice but then the vice looks well you know hammered
16. Electric drill and assortment of drill bits and cheap grinding stones and wire brushes, and if you haven’t got the bench vice you will learn why you should have one the first time you try and wire buff up a bolt holding it in one hand and the electric drill and wire brush in the other
17. Centre punch so your drilling does not go walkabout
18. Reasonable quality calipers, the digital kind that can read in inches or metric, up to 8 inch 200 mm are good
19. Some disposable breathing masks so that when you are doing a rattle can respray the only thing that does not get painted is your lungs
20. Steel ruler, one that is a metre long, handy for working out what shocks you have and to use as a straight edge to see if things are lined up or bent or buggered (steel tape measure is okay but no good as a straight edge)
21. Few different files, they have good names like Bastard and Rats Tail (do not mention these names to wife, she already thinks poorly of your friends)
22. File brush, a little flat brush thing for cleaning the files when they get clogged up with stuff
23. A steel pointer thing straight on one end hooked on the other for scratching/marking out work and picking out the aluminium from your files that the little flat brush won’t move
24. A magnet on a stick for picking up things that have fallen in where they shouldn’t be, won’t work on aluminium or stainless but if you didn’t know that already then I suggest lawn bowls is the right sporting challenge for you
25. Bottom third of a 20 L tin drum (did I mention tin snips?) and a stiff brush and some petrol to clean parts, there are more environmentally friendly and safer alternatives to petrol but hey it works and is traditional
26. A few different containers to put the bits in, and plastic bags and zip ties and labels if you are one of those blokes that eats hamburgers with a knife and fork (does lawns bowls interest you?)
27. Notepad to write down your list of things to buy and things to do and work out how much you think it’s going to cost you (and no smart comments here we don’t want to scare anyone off, because of course they may end up buying stuff off you)
28. Computer/Internet so you can look up stuff you don’t know and ask questions on this forum and find tradespeople to do the jobs you can’t do and buy parts from all over the world and check on the shipping updates every hour or so and your ebay bids every few minutes (best if the computer is in the shed, do not want to disturb the wife every few minutes)
29. And of course when the master of the house is not home her kitchen oven for heating parts so bearings come out and go back in and for curing paint
And then when you have struggled your way through the first resto’ and there is another bike you just have to have you may need:
30. A cheap compressor with an air nozzle so you can blow stuff around, and tire pumping up fitting so you don’t have to work the hand pump anymore (save the back for shakedown trials on the “new” bike)
31. A pedestal drill and some more drill bits and maybe even a couple of mill bits, and a drill vice and some clamps to stop stuff running away when you are making holes
32. Bench grinder with a general-purpose wheel on one end and a wire brush on the other end (and this is one place you don’t take chances – make sure you wear safety goggles (put them on the list) cause those little bits of wire brush that fly off in all directions are lethal to eyeballs. And practice heaps on sharpening drill bits because you will blunt heaps of the suckers until you learn about stainless and work hardening
33. More hand tools and pullers from Supercheap, most of which you will never use
34. Setup/jig to spin wheels so you can build your own wheels and sort out crappy spokes and try for hours to remove rim wobbles
35. Electrical multimeter so you can step-by-step follow the instructions you have read about on the Internet on how to test your 45-year-old Spanish ignition system that would not twitch a frog’s leg but bugger’s yours
And then when you’ve got half a dozen bikes and two or three resto’s going at once:
36. Welding kit, and to do it properly go down to Bunnings and get the oxyacetylene kit and learn how to gas weld and how to heat parts up without melting them, Comet 3 or equivalent Chinese rubbish gas set complete with gas axe. And get an assortment of welding rods, leather gloves are good and if you don’t have them you will soon burn your fingers picking up hot bits, on second thoughts don’t bother with the gloves ‘cause by now your fingers will be plenty burned anyways
37. Tig welder with a Bunnings gas bottle and learn how to tig weld aluminium and chrome molly and maybe even magnesium castings, make sure you get the right rods and practice heaps on old broken bits or your good stuff will become old broken bits
38. You might go an arc welder but bit heavy duty for old MX bikes
39. Tap and die set
40. Adjustable reamer set
41. Lathe and all of the bits that go with it, and learn how to use it by trial and error in which case make sure you don’t put your fingers in and don’t wear loose clothing and keep the rock star hair back in a ponytail or error will be your teacher. And if you want to learn how to do good stuff on the lathe without losing any body parts first then get a tradesmen to give you a few lessons or go to that local Tafe College
42. Milling machine (mill drill will probably suffice) with all the assortment cutting tools so you can make parts that you can’t find on the Internet, and a Tafe College course to learn how to be a handyman fitter and turner (first oxymoron)
43. Plating kit, so you can cad and nickel plate to make old stuff that is worn out and sloppy at least look new
44. Glass bead blasting cabinet. You may need to upgrade the cheap compressor
45. Secondhand electric oven so you don’t have to use the one that belongs to the master of the house – if by this stage she is still around
46. Soda blasting outfit
47. Probably a bigger shed or at least close the shed up so that cars can’t get in so you can just expand the motorcycle restoration business to take up all the space
48. Shed attic is good so you can put all the resto jobs that you just can’t get around to this year up top out of sight, not essential if the wife is no longer around
49. Couple of workshop chairs for the mates to sit on (you can get kitchen chairs and relocate them if the wife is no longer around) and beer ‘fridge (ditto re-purposing house ‘fridge if wife gone)
And lots of other stuff that other blokes have which puts it to the top of your must have list
And now to get off topic.
Those of you who think logically and are good “home managers” might want to put all of your tools and full replacement values onto your insurance policy, and whilst that might be the logical and sensible thing to do there is a school of thought that says if you do that then it will cost you dearly in the divorce (and if you’ve got all the above stuff it’s just a matter of when not if) because the wife will then have a written admission, legal documentary evidence of how much all that shit in the shed is worth and that’s probably about all you’ll end up getting because you will be in fourth place behind the wife and the two lawyers. Nutshell version, bin receipts, have a secret Ebay account, have a secret credit card for Paypal (hell why not - she’s got two secret cards) and never admit to anything
And since we are all friends here it’s probably okay to call out a few of you who don’t think things through properly particularly when you’re thinking about starting up a new life-changing hobby such as buying an old MX bike, so, some cold hard facts that roll the insurance, divorce and marriage advice up into the one neat package. For many years now the divorce rate has been about 45% generally yet the chances of getting burglarised or your place getting burnt down are only 1% or 2%, and if you can’t see how that is going to end up then I suggest you stay away from the MX bikes and perhaps give up the Pokies/TAB and instead say to the wife “I’ve been thinking – we should start doing more stuff together, there’s dancing lessons at the Hall every Wednesday night and I’d really like to go and learn dancing, would you come along, it would be really great to spend some socialising time with you and be together and it would help me get fit” (with my hand on my heart I tell you I’m now lookin’ for one of those little Pokémon things that is a bloke sticking his fingers down his throat to chuck but can’t find one so you’ll have to imagine it)
