OzVMX Forum
Clubroom => General Discussion => Topic started by: Doc on March 19, 2008, 10:54:06 pm
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In tradition of the ol' ADB's..feel free to add your own truths ;)
You know you're getting old when...
even with spectacles you still need a good magnifying glass and a bright sunny day to read the numbers on main jets!
when you build your bike box stock standard and you're justifiably proud of the fact!
when simply putting on your safety gear instigates the need for a short pause to catch your breath!
when gravity appears to be on the increase!
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When dirt now feels harder than bitumen used to...............
When you fall over and wonder what else you can do while you're down here.................
When you realise you're turning into your father!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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When your kids choose the radio station and you hear yourself saying, "This modern music all sounds the bloody same!!" :'(
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If it's over 21 degrees, it's too hot to ride, if it rained three weeks ago, it's too wet!
Velcro is your best friend and....
Asking the missus to get you out of your gear isn't as romantic as it once was! :-[
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You'd rather park near the toilets than the pits.
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it takes you 3 weeks to clean your air filter
you only work on your bike when you have a ride coming up and then its a panic to get it ready in time
you take you wheels to the shop for new tyres to be fitted
you can't start your bike cause it has a %*#@ Electrical Fault
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When you've gone from being a Crusty Demon to just plain crusty
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When you spend more on your bike than you do on hair products (ie; new bike sales people).
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I still like looking at naked women, I just can't remember why.
I get a lump in my throat instead of my pants when I do see one.
Of course they were Super Hunky quotes............ I'm not that funny............. :-\
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you spend way too much time on this forum instead of riding the forkers
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I takes me an hour to get warmed up, and by the time I'm warmed up, I'm knackered.
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you spend all your time between races dreaming about it, then you race for a tiny part of the day and go as slow as, then spend all the time till the next race recovering.
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When the must haves on a new bike is a start button.
When you actually do listen to the cheese and kisses
When your riding gear looks remarkably like Lawn bowls cremes
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When your chest goes to your stomach
When you start saying " back in my day" or " kids these days have no respect" and alike
When you lose your train of...........post office! I must get to the post office!
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Guys - what an absolute laugh - more so by the fact that so much of it is true!!! But I dont really want to own up to which ones epitomise me!
;D
Rossco
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when it takes you 2 hours, 7 trips to the car and shed to load up then another hour, trying to figure out if you have everything all for 45 mins of riding time, and when you get there you forgot to fill the cans up at the petrol station.
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the outside line is the safe and easy option - let the kids fight it over the inside lines
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When your nasal and ear hair grows faster than you head hair.
When you find yourself in a revolving conversation with a pimply faced kid about the bike in the back of your ute that goes something like this.
"G'day mister what kind of bikes that?"
"It's a bultaco son"
"Oh cool, what's that then a Honda, Suzuki, Yamaha?"
"No it's a Bultaco"
"Sure but who makes it Kawasaki?"
And around we go.
When you call a 20 y/o a "pimply faced kid"
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When a young fella ask "what the hell is that your riding"
When its more exciting catching up with everyone than riding at a VMX meeting
When the leg length of ya mx pants is smaller than the waist
When ya would jump something without thinking about it
When ya pack ya pills into ya MX gear bag
When something happened 20yrs ago but ya say 10yrs ago(where did that other 10yrs ago??)
When modern MX bikes all look the same
When the most important safety gear is ya kidney belt
When there is more hair growing out ya ears then on ya head
When ya cant open beer bottles with ya teeth(or is that just getting wiser)
Ya know ya getting older when ya know ya wiser(well at least ya think so)
Ya know ya getting older when ya think "where the hell is the white flag".
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When you complain about all the young blokes racing in your class, and those young blokes are 35
A five lap race feels like a 45 minute moto (unless you're Squirtmoto)
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..when you post on Ozvmx.
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Whats sad is that I've read this and it all has level of truth.
Now lets all find DOC and beat him to death for posting it in the 1st place. :)
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............................. lets all find DOC and beat him to death for posting it in the 1st place. :)
with a Suzuki footpeg !
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[lets all find DOC and beat him to death for posting it in the 1st place..with a Suzuki footpeg !
:o ya pack of bloody savages!!
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Maybe a complete CR 500 stator/rotor/cdi assembly eh Hoony? ;D
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:D
Right on Brother.
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Hoony basically all you stated, I have followed all my life :D....except the tyre part ..I seem to fit on everybody else's tyres for free! but not my own >:( Tim754 Oh and having you son say to you " get real and piss off dad I am nearly thirty...... ::)
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you know you're getting old when...
you find violent insults amusing :D
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when doin some normal maintenance on your bike and your five year old son says "dad why do you always buy wrecked bikes"....how come kids dont like bikes that are older than 25 years, i just dont get it.... :)
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In Magoo's case: It's getting harder and harder for sexual harassment charges to stick!
Some others: You know you are getting older when-Happy hour is a nap.
-It takes two tries to get off the couch.
-When your Doctor doesn't give you X-rays anymore but just holds you up to the light!
-Your idea of a night out is sitting on the verandah
-You remember when the Dead Sea was only sick.
Some oldies but goldies from all-over.
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...when you gas it off the line..but don't really fight for the first turn, playing it safe...but are the most competitive forker on earth to win an e-bay auction ;D ;D
...when you really spend more time on e-bay than your bike......
when you teach your daughter to clean filters-because it's "quality time" together
When you ride a Maico so you can always pull in early and say it broke( nevermind that you intetionally bog it down to load up the engine with gas because that open class forker was kicking your own ass).
when you can add something to this topic ;D ;D
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Doc,
The love is still there. ;)
Bahnsy
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:D oh I can feel it Bahnsy..really I can! :D
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Oh vomit spew chuck hurl chunder.........
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You have to get up for work and the body doesn't want to play anymore
You have a shower and theirs more hair on the floor of the shower then your head
You miss the paypacket each week because you know the bank has it
You have operations every couple of years to repair all your warn out parts
You don't worry about the way you look because you know brushing your hair wont stop you from being a ugly bugger anyway
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You know you are getting old when: You suffer from frequent bouts of premature ejaculation.(So I am told!).
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"ALWAYS LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE OF LIFE'.....at least your gettin a bit............. ::) had a DVD night last night. Monty Pythons Holy Grail, Flying High 1 & 2, Police Academy 1 & 2 . The teenagers visiting had not seen any of them but laughed and laughed at the stupidity then commented on them not needing piles of blood and horror to be enjoyed !!!! ;)
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......The rarity of your bike is more important that it's performance. Polishing and bling have replaced porting and suspension tuning and the quality of the beer in your Esky is more important thant the oil in your engine. :)
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You have more gray pubic hairs than normal colored on the top of your head. :'(
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Tim, I'm sitting here pissing myself laughing just thinking of flying high :D :D :D
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=_60AHBWoOXE&feature=related (http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=_60AHBWoOXE&feature=related)
another little snip that cracks me up..
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=dHKd80asXy4&feature=related (http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=dHKd80asXy4&feature=related)
..the others were also classics but this reminds me..
you know you're getting old when you look at the night sky and remember Johnny The Boy and The Night Rider! :D
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"Candallenie wants his hand back"
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remember the bit when the shit hit the fan...... on flying high ;D :)
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414 was that MAD MAX chained to the panal van I mean the arm. jimson
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"Oh my God, what's going on?"
"I dunno man, I just got here meself"
Jim Guse after laying the big Zed down.
Loved that first Mad Max, but for a great biking movie from way back when, howzabout Stone?
You know you're getting on when you can quote most of the movie verbatim!
I still pull it out every now and then to watch either the funeral procession - love the music - or the race between Captain Midnight and Stone. That scene where the Z1 lifts the front as it hits that slight rise on the road. Man that used to get me every time. I have an old copy on video, the Stone Anniversary DVD, and the actual album of the sound track...
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Mad Max, his panel van and someone else's arm yes Jim. Yeah Stone would have to be the all time best. The very start where the guy's turning on the petrol tap, hitting the start button and then going out and getting his head taken off with piano wire. Very cool indeed....... 8)
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Yeah Stone would have to be the all time best.
Yeah you know you are getting old when you remember getting excited over Rebecca's tits.
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When you discover that your waist measurement is now larger than your chest.
And what marcFX said.
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Yeah you know you are getting old when you remember getting excited over Rebecca's tits.
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Still do get excited over Becs tits.Just need some modern tonic to get the mongrel to stay up longer than the film shows her baps.
A viagra pill,a can of Red Bull,and lookout,go off like a frog in a sock!
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You know you're getting old when you remember the first set of quads at Tivoli and that Darren Smart jumped them the first time out(on a DR400) and Gally and co. said it was quicker to do 'em two at a time!!